That Gem's Corner (What do I do my husband and good friend?)

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Remember you to can offer advice by just leaving a comment down below in the comment section. Well, Diamonds and Gents I got an email and here it is down below:

What's going on Ms. Tra That Gem?   Girl you were right.  I know you a looking at this computer like right about what?  I was the one that sent you message about my man being a Pastor and I thought he was cheating.  Well, needless to say he got tired of it and wanted to separate.  Which leads me to my new problem?  By the way I love you, your blog and your videos. You are super funny feel like you my long lost friend in my head (in my Wendy voice).  But, I didn't want you to make a video out of this.  Some stuff you just need to read in black and white.

Let me get to my problem.  Well, about little bit after I sent Mother Steel that letter my husband was getting feed up already.  Girl a storm was brewing and I wasn't aware.  OK. So I confronted him about a woman being in his office.   Come to find out it was his cousin from Kansas his 3rd time every seeing her.  His mom told me.  He ask me to leave.  For awhile because after all it was his house in the beginning.

Well the last couple of months we have been working it out.  He seemed excited so I thought.  Until one of my co-workers seen my childhood bestfriend and him out several times together.   She finally told me because the last time they were so close she thought it was me. Wait with what she thought look like a ring on her finger. He gave her.  Wait and he told me he was suppose to be out of town preaching.  I called her I got no answer.  Matter of fact I haven't talk to her and it has been 2 weeks.  I always use to share everything with her about our relationship.  She use to always say I don't know what I had because if he was mine. Well Ms. Tra I was with him the other night.  But, I was to scared to bring it up.  I miss my husband.  I want my marriage back.  It seem like he is really trying to make it work I don't know what to do.

Pastor Anonymous

Dear Pastor Anonymous,

Wait my Diamond sistah!  Did you say he put you out for confronting him?  Now, that might've been his cousin.  He might not be cheating or was.  But, he put you out for confronting him. 

Well, I got be honest with you he put you out because the pressure properly was getting to him to explore his options.  Truth is he just didn't want you all in his grill while he wanted to explore that option.  Because, for real serious you confront him looks like several times before.  What was so different about this time?  Wait and this time he could really make you look like a A sorry gotta say it.  Why?  My man could really prove your insecurity and get you right together.  This is my long lost cousin.  You know men live to be right.  Especially with there opponent women.  Because, our ashtray's always gotta be right.  So that right there red flag goes up for me.

Now, he is working on it.  Your friend all of sudden gets distance.  Now, a co-worker tells you have seeing them several times together.  Let me point out one key factor here you didn't pick up sis.  The co-worker is not pity.  Because if home girl was she would've told you the 1st time she seen them together.  Maybe the second time she seen them together it look like she was to close for comfort.

Women stop sharing everything about your man with your friends and other women.  Listen when she said if he was mine.  Red flag would've been came up for me.  Listen they probably is seeing each other.  But, if the co-worker seen him give her ring.  Then boo it's time for you to ask him. 

Never confront another woman about your da*n man period.  Your next dinner y'all need to have a heart to heart.  Change your approach.  The other times it was low self- esteem and you were wrong as hellz.  This time someone seen it with there own two eyes.    Listen here you don't want to be thinking it's working out.  Then you look up Ms.  Lady having his baby.  Is the new Preacher's Wife. 

Talk to your man.  Don't go accusing him?  Ask him.  Straight out.  Baby are you seeing someone eles or my best friend.  See what he says.  If he come out a bag on you and don't answer yep he is.  If he the cool and silent and give you answer that he is counseling her or something.  Then, you need to offer your assistance for that next counseling session.  If he denies then you got your answer.

But, real talk either way.  You already have time invested I'm sure.  But, honnee if you can't talk to your man then what kind of relationship can you all have anyway.  It's time to go get counseling to deal with you all communication issues.  But, don't think it's working out and really honnee it's not.  It's time to talk to your man.  It could be innocent she could be helping him plan something for you anything so don't go with accusations go asking. Things you are looking at.... If he comes out a bag from you questioning if he is seeing her. Then he seeing her.  If he respond with what it is, then y'all working it out. But, don't be naïve or a fool because you want your marriage.  A lot of women go wrong doing that very thing.  Please update me.  I will be praying sis for your marriage.  COUNSELING, COUNSELING AND MORE COUNSELING.

Be Blessed.

Don't forget to leave comment down below.  It takes a village.  Also, to be featured in the next That Gem's corner click that pic on the top right hand side of the screen leave in my fb inbox.  Or email at Make sure to title it That Gem's Corner.

Much Love Darlings!!!


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